I've been locked in my house for the last two week, and have only been able to go out once in a while. Just to hang up in Otley or to go to a movie or Thursday nights in Pella. So, i feel that if i don't do something crazy or exciting, I will loose my mind. So here are some ideas for something crazy to do during the summer.
Spray Paint something evil or vulgar on the following teachers houses
* Mrs. Dehaan
* Mr. Graham
* Mrs. Kuyper
Gather a protest group
Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
Develop an unnatural fear of staplers.
Reply to everything someone says with “That's what you think.”
Finish all your sentences with “In accordance with the prophecy.”
Specify that your drive-through order is “to go.”
Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party, because you're "not in the mood"
Sit in a parked car and point a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
swap personalities with one of my friends for the night.
People you know will take a while to work out what is going on – watch their confused expressions and laugh at them as if they were idiots.
Walk around Pella during Thursday Nights in Pella wearing a sign that says "The end is near" while ringing a bell
Stand in Wal-Mart and when someone goes on the speakers, cower up against a wall mumbling about how I am “hearing the voices again”
walk along a side walk and impersonate vulcan with his ‘Live Long and Prosper’ hand sign, whilst shouting “Spread the Love!!” as people drive past. (Don’t stick your hand too far out of the car though. One-Handed Jim isn’t called that for nothing, you know!)
Invent a crazy dance routine, and a pick a suitable song to accompany it. (Alien Ant Farm’s version of ‘Smooth Criminal’, for instance.) Now whenever that particular song comes on, you and your friends must dance to it, no matter where you are, what the occasion, and regardless of whether you are drunk or not. This will get you instant recognition and respect wherever you go.
Be mindful of your chosen routine though – a dance that consists of frantic wiping of limbs accompanied by the words “NOT GAY! NOT GAY!” will not go down very well in the local gay bar…
Stand in a close rack at a store and when an old lady walks by, shake the clothes from the inside saying “PICK ME, PICK ME!”
move a wet floor sign next to a urinal in the boys bathroom
Get a box of condoms, fill them with lotion and randomly place them around public places
Tell a telemarketer, when they ask for one of my parents, that I “killed him in their sleep”
buy an inflatable friend...and bring then everywhere and treat them as if they are ‘just one of the girls’. Buy them drinks, chat with them, take them for a good mosh on the dance-floor and generally make them feel loved. Remember: plastic people have feelings too.
If anyone asks “What’s the occasion?” or wonders why you have brought a blow-up doll with you, your response should be: “Why shouldn’t he come out with us – he’s our friend!”
(Note: Take good care of your artificial companion! Jealous people with cigarettes can be a hazard. And be courteous – it is always polite to inform your friend about your wish to deflate him before you do so.)
* Find a number you like and become obsessed with it.
and do the following
1. Buy all the t-shirts and items of clothing you can with that number on it, or, if that fails, go to a t-shirt printers and get some made. If you prefer, there is always the option of buying an age badge of your number from any good card/gift shop. If they have sold out of your number, make your badge out of paper plates and cocktail sticks.
2. Every time you spot your number (whether on your own or in public) point to it and scream “Oooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!” as loud as you can.
3. write your number on your forehead
4. Sometimes a nonsensical word, for instance ‘Toyspens’, can be used in conjunction with your chosen number for added effect. However, be very careful when deciding on your word or you may end up accidentally summoning the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse again.
5. If someone asks you “Why??” laugh hysterically and then ignore them for a few days. They’ll soon realise their mistake.
Things to do with a bright light:
2. Buy a bright light and as you pass pedestrians, shine it directly at them, but only briefly. Watch as they look at themselves in amazement as they glow! Prolonged shining will cause them to spot where the beam is originating from – watch their expression as they realize they are not being abducted by aliens, or being selected by God for some higher purpose, after-all!
(Please note: miss-aimed torch shining will merely blind your victims, and is not as much fun. If this happens, remedy the situation by shouting “I’m Randomising you!!” at them as you pass.)
3. Direct the light at house windows, to cause the residents to look outside & to see what the hell is going on is considered cruel. Those people might have been asleep! And what if they’re elderly? Do you want them to have a heart attack and die? Shame on you!! (The elderly should be excluded from all insanity trips for just this reason!)
4. For safety reasons, I do not condone the aiming of lights at other car drivers.
Go on a drunken isanity trip: - After a night out, it is customary for ordinary members of the public to become loud and obtrusive. And as a rule, people on an insanity trip will often get made fun of for being, well … insane. Respond appropriately: If you are sober enough to think of something crazy to say that will make them think twice about messing with your ‘homies’, then say it! It’s your right to be a nut-case! If, however, you are too inebriated to walk or see, the blowing of a raspberry in their general direction will suffice. There is no ‘clever’ answer to “Tttthhhhhrrrrrrrruuuuppppppppp!!!!”
- You may wish perhaps to indulge in your own drunken stupidity at the end of a piss-up. This is OK, only if you accept the fact that people will put your insane acts down to you being wasted. For instance, the thievery of a Macdonalds uniform from a washing line is only made insane if you put it on over your clothes in the middle of town and proceed to scream: “DO YOU WANT SOME FUCKING CHIPS WITH THAT??” at passers by.
- Remember to be creative – for a practice run, try dancing around a traffic cone or lamp-post with your friends, holding hands and singing:
“Sometimes I think you’re straight!
Sometimes I think you’re gay!
Sometimes I think you’re bisexual –
I change my mind every day!”
- Meals at restaurants can be made much more interesting, and more value for money, if you make use of the leftover food. One way of achieving this is to create a scene from your favourite film. If, for instance, you choose the popular Lord of the Rings Trilogy, please note that roast dinners make a good reconstruction of Middle Earth. However the size of such a production will require donations from other peoples’ leftovers.
(Remember, it is unlikely that you will be able to outdo the special effects of the film itself, but try to be realistic as you can - Peas make amazingly accurate Hobbits, whilst the character of Gandalf the Grey would be much better suited to a gravy covered parsnip.
If you have time, you may wish to animate certain aspects of your finished masterpiece. Be mindful of other eaters if you choose to bring any ‘flying’ creatures to life…)
- Cinemas are also a convenient source of fun for the sanity-deficient. All those people watching …watching …WATCHING!! It is usually not permitted for customers to bring their bags, or own food into the screen with them. This being the case, take along one whole loaf of bread in a carrier bag. When the ushers tell you that you are not allowed bags in with you, surprise them by taking out the loaf of bread, handing them the bag and walking passed them into the screen. Then, the next time you go to that same cinema, take with you a carrier bag containing a box of cereal, carton of milk, a couple of breakfast bowls and some spoons.
- At the end of the film insist on waiting until all the credits have finished before leaving, and then cackle hysterically at the ‘funny bit’ at the end – even if there isn’t one.
(Note:Some ushers will be patient with you, others may not be. Either way they will all think you are crazy.)
Lists I found searching on Google:
Crazy things to do in a drive through
1. Drive through the drive thru in reverse and let your passenger order.
2. Ask prices of everything on the menu then order something that you did not ask the price for.
3. Pretend like your window is broken. Tell the employee this. Order with your door open, pay with your door open. Roll down window and take food through the window.
4. Go to McDonalds and demand a big breakfast at 11:30 at night. Put up a fight.
5. Pay for a large order in pennies and nickels unwrapped.
6. Order in another language. Be careful what neighborhood you are in.
7. When asked if they can take your order, tell them you are just window shopping and drive on.
8. Laugh sadistically when asked if you would like ketchup.
9. Ask how they fit into that little box.
10. If they make you wait, make them wait when they come back on.
11. Demand to speak to the manager. When he comes on, complain that you did not like the way the employee said "May I take your order?"
12. When asked if they can take your order say "No, why can't I take yours?"
13. If they ask you to wait, order anyway and keep doing it till they yell at you.
14. Pretend like your car broke down. Ask for assistance in moving it. When they come out, drive away.
15. Tell them you have to use the bathroom.
16. Order a cup of water and two napkins. That's it.
17. Don't order when they come on. Just sit there. If a line forms behind you, get out of the car and cause a scene.
18. When they hand you your food, hand them a bag back with all the trash from your car in it.
19. Just stare at them when you pay and get your food. Don't break your stare.
20. Honk your horn the whole way through the line
Things to do in a store:
1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.
2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.
3. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.
4. Start playing Calvinball; see how many people you can get to join in.
5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.
6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.
7. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.
8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.
9. When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially thin narrow aisles.
10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in House wares" and see what happens.
11. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volumes to "10".
12. Play with the automatic doors.
13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!..." etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.
14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who BUYS this crap, anyway?"
15. Repeat Number 14 in the jewelry department.
16. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you're taking it for a "test drive."
17. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department.
18. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.
19. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow. Magic!"
20. Put M&M's on lay away.
21. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.
22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.
23. Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles.
24. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.
25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "...I'm Batman. Come, Robin--to the Batcave!"
26. TP as much of the store as possible.
27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.
28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello" upside down.
29. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
30. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, "Red Rover!"
31. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples here?"
32. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.
33. Take bets on the battle described above.
34. Nonchalantly "test" the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.
35. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.
36. Hold indoor shopping cart races.
37. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission: Impossible."
38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.
39. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.
40. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?"
41. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.
42. Two words: "Marco Polo."
43. Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle, etc.
44. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's in Electronics.
45. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look with various funnels.
46. When someone steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.
47. Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.
48. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices again!"
49. Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.
50. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.
51. Fall on the floor laughing. Even better if you rant incoherently about losing your musical toothbrush.
more lists at www.getannoyed.com
-Good day my friends-
